The nights now have a crisp chill in the air, even though we're still roasting during the day (and that's not roasting marshmallows)! I love the dramatic Fall colors as nature changes the leaves on trees and foliage everywhere.The horses are growing their winter coats already! And everyone is thinking and drinking Pumpkin!
My current life is such a roller-coaster in so many ways-
I have good days, and not so good days.
I have days I can eat, and days where... well you know by now... days where it's me and "John" hanging out together way too much!
I have days where I think I can go into work, then my side-effects sabotage me.
I have days where my aches, tingling, buzzing and neuropathy truly surprises me.
I have days where my GI symptoms just won't subside.
I have days where I feel I've been punched in the gut.
I have days when I schedule too much (which would be next to nothing in a "normal" person's life), where I am just so tired and exhausted.
I have days when I don't think I can make it from my office up the hill to my car.
Sadly, I have too many days where I actually can't recall what it feels like to be "normal". I sure don't like this sickly cancerous "new normal" at all.
And then... I have days where a breeze catches my hair in a certain way (yes I have decided to grow it out), or the sun or moon shines in a particular way, or my animals do something remarkable, or I taste something delightful (no metal mouth!), or I drive my lil Bug with all the windows rolled down, or I have a really meaningful conversation with someone, or I do something that really impacts someone's life, or something's really gut-splitting funny and I get to laugh...a lot.
Those are the moments when I remember what "normal" is.
Thanks for posting this Kelly, so I could steal it! |
And so, true to theme, my Myeloma life is currently a numerical roller-coaster. Those dang Myeloma numbers were up again this last blood test. But of course they are... those silly little cancer cells just want to remind me of my back-in-treatment-for-a-year-now anniversary. But actually, I really haven't ever been fully out of treatment... just a little chemo break for part of 2012/2013. It's coming up on my 5 year diagnosis anniversary. So we took a little drive, just because... just because we still can, and we are still here! So there, take that, stinkin myeloma!
WBC's = 3.3 (4.0-11 scale) low, thus very susceptible to everyone's cooties
ANC (Absolute Neutrophils Count) = 1.3 (1.8-7.7 x 1000/mcL) = low!
M-Protein/M-Spike= 0.82 (normal = 0.0) higher = (bad)
Beta Globulin Electrophoresis= 1.47 (0.65-1.10 scale) higher = (bad)
Gamma Globulin Electrophoresis= 0.42 (0.70-1.60 scale) lower = (bad)
Protein Electrophoresis= (always) Abnormal
IGA= 1140 (70-400 scale) up almost 3x normal (I'm "high risk" IgA Myeloma)
IGG= 287 (700-1600 scale) too low
IGM= < 17 (40-230 scale) too low
So like a good patient, I took my Dex steroids today, started 10mg Revlimid again for 21 days, popped a baby Aspirin, Acyclovir (shingles preventative), Vitamin B12, D3 and will start Mepron again asap (as that also contributes to the "volcanic" events). I'll use Omeprazole, Imodium, Lomotil, etc, as necessary. My head is headachy, my skin is buzzing, my right lower leg is swollen, I am forever thirsty, and when I walked in the half moon moonshine a bit tonight, I "dribble" from the Dex... hahahaaa so funny!
But life is good in the BIG picture of things, and I am STILL here. From what I read and hear... I've outlived my probability and statistics! Whooo hoooo!!
And to celebrate my life and passion for rescuing the 4 baby sparrows, my dear creative artist friend Kathy made me this stunningly beautiful painting! Thank you for your friendship, love, support, laughs, deep conversations and amazing artistic creativity Kathy! Looove you and my Birdie Art so much!!!
Live happy, live well, and make a difference somewhere, somehow, with someone or something as often as you can!